31 August 2011

On Nature (an obsession and a need)

Posted in Interests, Nature, Passions, Poetry tagged , , , , at 22:56 by rtereholt

As hectic as it often is, I love my life.  (I love my life!)  There are things I would change if I could, of course, but it does not take much to make me happy.  If my relatives were closer, life would be practically perfect.  When it all gets to be too much, though, I find that stepping back and taking the time to get outside and ‘hug a few trees’ goes a really long way toward dissipating stress.

Due to my schedule, I spend the better part of the daylight hours sleeping, and it can be difficult to short myself on sleep and wake up early on my days off (especially since I am a night-owl by nature).  If we have a full day free of obligations (oh, so rare a day is this), we get up at the break of dawn to drive 2 hours to our favourite lake for a day of swimming, hiking, horseback riding, picnicking, and a lot of reading and napping lazily under the trees.  Sadly, my regular exercise regimen is mostly done inside, though: cycling, weights, stability ball work, and a variety of Tai Chi forms and Yoga routines.  I also expend quite a lot of excess energy dancing and singing to Bollywood filmi music while doing my chores (‘garaj baras saawan ghir aayo…’), although this is not officially part of my fitness programme.  (Oh, yes—‘Sorry,’ to my neighbor downstairs, for those rare times he is home when I am bebopping around.).  My husband and I love to walk and hike, however, and we are lucky to have several wonderful parks in our area that have paths and trails that offer a range of difficulty levels.  Yesterday afternoon was perfect weather, sunny and breezy without the gross stickiness that has been ubiquitous this summer.  We opted to leave the laundry for later in the week in favour of a taking long, moderately-paced stroll along a tree-shaded bike path that meanders along a river.  This was exactly what we needed; all of our recent walks have been around our apartment complex in the middle of the night.  As we strode along the river, we were so wrapped up in each other and in the sights, sounds, and smells of our surroundings that we were surprised when we hit the 4-mile mark.  We hated to turn around and go back to the parking lot, but we had a dinner date with the in-laws, so we had to pick up the pace on our return to ‘civilisation.’

What is it about nature that is so restorative for the human soul?  (While I have known people who could not bear anything even vaguely resembling nature, I have long held the secret certainty that these individuals are all alien pod people.)  I would rather be outdoors doing just about anything than to be doing just about anything indoors.  Read a book—go outdoors.  Shell peas—go outdoors.  Do homework—go outdoors.  Take a nap—go outdoors.  Actually, it is odd; I must have nearly pitch black conditions in order to be able to sleep inside, but I can nap in the dappled shade of a tree at mid-day with no problems.  Nature just naturally relaxes me in a way nothing else can (except church).  I can be having an awful day, but if I sit outside on the swing for my ‘lunch’ (at 2030, so it is nice and cool) and watch the hummingbirds and the swaying of the trees, then I am refreshed and ready to tackle the rest of my shift.  Swimming in an ocean, lake, or river is so much more fun and so much more exhilarating than slogging back and forth in a pool.  Heck, even paddling my feet in a shallow creek is a fabulous way to spend a day.  But why?  Why does the outdoors make me feel like I am in a chapel, make me feel relieved and unburdened, make me feel like I am where I am supposed to be?  I recently skimmed an article about the wavelengths that natural things resonate at.  Perhaps that has something to do with it.  Prolonged, close range exposure to electronic devices makes me feel ill, so why can’t lounging against a tree or walking barefoot through the grass make me feel better?  Whatever the reason, I am glad I feel that way.

I would love the chance to travel across more of the U.S. and explore wilderness areas.  Let’s see: Florida, Arkansas, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Missouri, Tennessee, and Hawai’i…  I only have 42 more states to go!  Even more so, I wish I had the time and money to travel the world.  [Of course, the cost of my obsessive travel photography alone would be staggering (I don’t even want to think about the logistics involved with travelling with what I would consider ‘enough’ film)!  Digital just is NOT the same, although I probably should go that route with colour shots since I do not develop or print from colour film in my darkroom.  Anyway—back on track…]  I would like to explore natural places everywhere to see if the exact sense of the sacred differs in any way from place to place.  (Getting to meet the people and experience all of the cultures along the way would be a nice perk, too.)  Now I just need to come up with the perfect mickey to slip to my husband so I can get him on a plane!

 O-kay, this calls for some poetry!  LOL

. . . .

WOODLAND WHISPERS

Whispers slither through my flesh—

insinuation, innuendo, that subtlety

that only nature can possess.

I lie awake—but only just—

in dappled light, and watch absorbed

as small creatures creep and skitter

and a doe steps gingerly in the treeline

with her watchful liquid gaze.

We look across the undulating lawn—

eyes meeting, measuring—

and by her side the speckled fawn moves,

restless with such curiosity

as slew more than one felid.

But mother is somewhat wiser,

and she stands with twitching tail,

unblinking, wary and on edge…

While still the rustling of each

blade of grass whispers

to my skin of beauty and life

and tells secrets to my primal mind

that I never can recall.

. . . .

So long for now.

14 August 2011

José Again

Posted in Entertainment, Hobbies, Interests, Language, Passions, Poetry, Writing tagged , , at 05:13 by rtereholt

(This post is the translation of my previous message.  I did not think I would be able to get to this so soon, but work is dreadfully slow tonight.)

Many years ago I came into possession of a book of poems written by José Ángel Buesa y Regato.  In fact, I found this book so long ago that I cannot even remember how or when I bought it.  In this book, I found a newspaper article written in honor of the author after his death (in 1982).  The poems in this book were very beautiful, perfect vehicles for transporting the fantasies of a young dreamer.  In addition, the article caught my curiosity about the poet.  Each time that I read this book of poetry, my imagination takes flight again; and when I see the article, my curiosity catches fire once more.

Among other things, I am a poet and a photographer.  The two are very important in my life; I cannot separate them from who I am.  As a good photographer must always see everything with respect to a photograph, being a poet means that you cannot live without thinking about every image, every idea, and every emotion with respect to the imagery of a poem.  Buesa lived to write his poems.

José Ángel Buesa is described as ‘the most famous, the most artistic, and the most influential of the contemporary Cuban poets.’  Readers can appreciate that this poet worked hard and with attention on his poems.  He did not allow slips and he had a clear concept of his style and his preferred form.  He knew the importance of always studying seriously.

Buesa began writing at a very young age.  He wrote many poems, and he also wrote other types of literature.  His popular radio serials were sold in many American countries.  He published nearly two dozen poetry collections and also published books of prose.  Buesa was only twenty-two years old when he published his first book of poems, ‘The Flight of the Hours’.  His most famous collection of poetry, ‘Oasis,’ has now been published in twenty-six editions.

Buesa spent the last two decades of his life outside his native Cuba.  During his exile, his poems lived only in the hearts of his people.  Today, this poet has much respect in his country of origin.  His legacy influences many of the Hispanic poets writing today.

Buesa wrote of life and romance.  In truth, the poems of Buesa still help many men to seduce women.  His poems have been musicalized by the composer and pianist Adolfo Guzman.  You can listen to them on radio and in nightclubs and in other places.

Now, you can read four short poems…  Just bear with my translations, please; poetic language can be a bit trickier than average speech, and my Spanish is extremely rusty.

. . . .

The Old Tree

Good tree that suddenly lost the gifts

of the flower and of the fruit, beneath the cold gust,

your austere sorrow seems like mine,

and so, like your leaves will fly my songs.

.

But, sooner or later, will come the spring,

and, to rejuvenate your aged trunk,

you will have the flower and the fruit, and the foliage, and the nest…

and I, instead, have not even your hope.

.

One hundred times you offered me your shade in the summer;

one hundred times your perfume came to visit my home,

good tree that blossoms while life passes,

perhaps because you are unaware that it never goes in vain.

.

My childhood you remember almost like a friend,

although already has cracked your old age of grandfather.

And today, to see how you still grow toward the sky,

not even the comfort of growing old with you remains to me.

.

Well, even though identical falls oppress us,

over your dry leaves grow lush leaves,

and so, some day, the wind will dishevel my grey hairs,

will carry to me the perfume of your new shoots…

. . . .

The Son of the Dream

A son… Do you know, do you feel what this is?

To see born the life of the depth of a kiss,

by an ineffable miracle of love;

a kiss that fills up the emptied cradle,

and that naively we looked at and smiled:

a kiss made flower…

.

A son… A fragrant, strong and sweet bond!

I seem to see it above your lap already palpitating;

and I look to move it with childish pledge

the small hands of our little one

as if they wanted to hold onto a dream

that comes and goes…

.

In the fresh water of our tenderness

you will moisten the wings of your mischief,

like a dove that learns to fly,

and you will be violent, crazy and odd,

and you will love equally the woman and the wine,

and the sky and the sea…

.

With the bitter thirst of adolescence,

You will drink in the murky spring of science

and, tender singing,

you will leave for the world, with your lyre to the shoulder

leaving a trail of roses of amazement

and a golden splendor…

.

You will cross at a gallop the arid plain,

pallid from daydreaming, crazy from adventure

and drunk on ideals;

and, in your delirium from remote journeys,

you will return one day with the broken oars,

bringing in your lips the taste of salt.

.

Ridiculous wayfarer of lifeless paths,

you will pass your shadow above the deserts,

in an infinite pilgrimage

and your hallucinated nonconforming pupil

you will see in your destiny an enormous

question.

.

But your tenacious adventures will be useless,

pursuing a dream that you can never reach…

and it must be so,

because you will find nothing, like me, the goal

of all your uneasiness of man and of poet;

because in the women of your anxious life

you will find no one like yourself…

.

You are the rose of a lonely life,

the rose that no one will see repeated,

because plucking it will shrivel the rosebush

and, as in the world later you will not have that rose,

he will go on his long fruitless search,

in search of an equal!

. . . .

The Insatiable Thirst

To say good-bye…  That is life.

And I tell you good-bye, and I go…

To return to love is the prison

of those who love with excess.

.

To love and love all of life,

and to burn and to burn in this flame.

And not to know why we love…

and not to know why we forget…

.

To seize the roses one by one,

to drink one wine and another wine,

and to walk and walk by a road

that does not lead anywhere.

.

To feel more thirst at each fountain

and to see more shadow in each chasm,

in this love that is always the same

but that is always different.

.

Because in the muted disagreement

of the dreamed and the lived,

always, from the bottom of forgetfulness,

is born the death of a memory.

.

And in this unceasing anguish,

that touches the soul and does not touch it,

to kiss the shadow of another mouth

in each mouth that you kiss…

. . . .

Final Poem

Once again your roads carry me toward the dawn,

when now in my smile died the last child.

Once again that arrow is sticking itself in the night,

and the autumn rain to dream with you.

.

Once again these hands are rising up toward the dream,

and these deaf roots thirsty for dew.

And the profound disaster of growing in the shadow,

with closed eyes and vacant arms.

.

Once again that torch that exhausted my blood,

and that dark silence that extends your heartbeat.

—Oh, heart of excitement in the black glade,

dying eternally and eternally alive.

.

Oh, yes, once again and always to die in each star,

and to light that lamp that went out from the cold.

Oh, yes, once again and always, until life dies;

once again toward the dawn, and all the roads!

José Ángel Buesa y Regato

Posted in Entertainment, Hobbies, Interests, Language, Passions, Poetry, Writing tagged , , at 03:15 by rtereholt

Hoy, quiero hablar de un poeta cubano.  Debido a esto, estoy escribiendo en español.  Voy a traducir este mensaje más adelante.  Lo prometo.

Hace muchos años que entró en posesión de un libro de poesía escrito por José Ángel Buesa y Regato.  De hecho, me encontré con este libro hace tanto tiempo que ni siquiera puedo recordar cómo o cuando lo compré.  Dentro de este libro descubrí un artículo de periódico escrito en honor del autor después de su muerte (en 1982).  Los poemas en este libro fueron muy hermosos, vehículos perfectos para transportar las fantasías de una joven soñadora.  Además el artículo capturó mi curiosidad por el poeta.  Cada vez que yo leo este poemaria, mi imaginación echa a volar de nuevo; y cada vez que veo al artículo, mi curiosidad se prende fuego una vez más.

Entre otras cosas, soy una poeta y una fotógrafa.  Los dos son muy importantes en mi vida; no puedo separarlos de quien soy.  Como un buen fotógrafo debe ver siempre a todo el mundo con respeto a una foto, ser un poeta significa que no puede vivir sin pensar en cada imagen, cada idea, y cada emoción con respeto a la imaginería de una poema.  Buesa vivió para escribir sus poemas.

José Ángel Buesa está describido como «el más famoso, el más artista y el más influyente de los poetas cubanos contemporáneos.»  Los lectores pueden apreciar que este poeta trabajado duro y con cuidado por sus poemas.  No permitió deslices y tenía un claro concepto de su estilo y su forma preferida.  Él sabía la importancia de estudiando siempre en serio.

Buesa comenzó a escribir a una edad muy temprana.  Él escribe muchos poemas, y escribe también por otros tipos de literatura.  Sus populares novelas radiales se han vendido en muchos paises de America.  Publicó casi dos docenas de poemarias y publicó tambien libros de prosa.  Buesa tenía solo veintidós años cuando publicó su primero libro de poemas, «La fuga de las horas.»  Su poemaria más famosa, «Oasis», ahora se ha publicado en veintiséis ediciones.

Buesa pasó las últimas dos décadas de su vida fuera de su Cuba natal.  Mientras su exilio, sus poemas vivido solo en los corazones de la gente.  Hoy este poeta tiene mucho respeto en su país de origen.  Su legado influye a muchos de los poetas hispánicos que escribe hoy.

Buesa escribió de la vida y del romance. De veras, los poemas de Buesa aún ayudan a muchos hombres a seducir a las mujeres.  Tambien, sus poemas habían sido musicalizados por el compositor y pianista Adolfo Guzman.  Puede oírlos en la radio y en los clubes nocturnos y en varios lugares.

Ahora, puede leer cuatros poemas cortos…

. . . .

El árbol viejo

Buen árbol que perdiste bruscamente los dones

de la flor y del fruto, bajo la racha fría:

tu pesadumbre austera se parece a la mía,

y así, como tus hojas, volarán mis canciones.

.

Pero, tarde o temprano, vendrá la primavera,

y, al rejuvenecerse tu tronco envejecido,

tendrás la flor y el fruto, y el follaje, y el nido…

Y yo, en cambio, no tengo tu esperanza siquiera.

.

Cien veces me ofreciste tu sombra en el verano;

cien veces tu perfume fue a visitar mi casa,

buen árbol que floreces mientras la vida pasa,

acaso porque ignoras que nunca pasa en vano.

.

Mi niñez te recuerda casi como un amigo,

aunque ya se agrietaba tu ancianidad de abuelo.

Y hoy, al ver cómo creces todavía hacia el cielo,

ni aun me queda el consuelo de envejecer contigo.

.

Pues, aunque nos agobian idénticos otoños,

sobre tus hojas secas crecen hojas lozanas,

y así, algún día, el viento despeinará mis canas,

trayéndome el perfume de tus nuevos retoños…

. . . .

El hijo del sueño

Un hijo…  ¿Tú sabes, tú sientes qué es eso?

Ver nacer la vida del fondo de un beso,

por un inefable milagro de amor;

un beso que llene la cuna vacía,

y que ingenuamente nos mire y sonría:

un beso hecho flor…

.

Un hijo… ¡Un fragante, fuerte y dulce lazo!

Me parece verlo sobre tu regazo palpitando ya;

y miro moverse con pueril empeño

las pequeñas manos de nuestro pequeño,

como si quisieran sujetar un sueño

que llega y se va…

.

En el agua fresca de nuestras ternuras

mojará las alas de sus travesuras,

como una paloma que aprende a volar;

y será violento, loco y peregrino,

y amará igualmente la mujer y el vino,

y el cielo y el mar…

.

Con la sed amarga de la adolescencia,

beberá en la fuente turia de la ciencia;

y, tierno cantor,

irá por el mundo, con su lira al hombro,

dejando un reguero de rosas de asombro

y un áureo fulgor…

.

Cruzará al galope la árida llanura,

pálido de ensueño, loco de aventura

y ebrio de ideal;

y, en su desvario de viajes remotos,

volverá algún día con los remos rotos,

trayendo en los labios un sabor de sal.

.

Caminante absurdo de caminos muertos,

pasará su sombro sobre los desiertos,

en una infinita peregrinación;

y su alcinada pupila inconforme

verá en su destino grabada una enorme

interrogación.

.

Pero será inútil su tenaz andanza,

persiguiendo un sueño que jamás se alcanza…

Y ha de ser así,

pues no hallará nunca, como yo, la meta

de todas sus ansias de hombre y de poeta;

porque en las mujeres de su vida inquieta

no hallará ninguna parecida a ti…

.

Que tú eres la rosa de una sola vida,

la rosa que nadie verá repetida,

porque al deshojarse secará el rosal;

y, como en el mundo ya no habrá esa rosa,

¡él irá en su larga búsqueda infructuosa,

en pos de una igual!

. . . .

La sed insaciable

Decir adiós…  La vida es eso.

Y yo te digo adiós, y sigo…

Volver a amar es el castigo

de los que amaron con exceso.

.

Amar y amar toda la vida,

y arder y arder en esa llama.

Y no saber por qué se ama…

Y no saber por qué se olvida…

.

Coger las rosas una a una,

beber un vino y otro vino,

y andar y andar por un camino

que no conduce a parte alguna.

.

Sentir más sed en cada fuente

y ver más sombra en cada abismo,

en este amor que es siempre el mismo

pero que siempre es diferente.

.

Porque en el sordo desacuerdo

de lo soñado y lo vivido,

siempre, del fondo del olvido,

nace la muerte de un recuerdo.

.

Y en esta angustia que no cesa,

que toca el alma y no la toca,

besar la sombra de otra boca

en cada boca que se besa…

. . . .

Último poema

Otra vez tus caminos me llevan hacia el alba,

cuando ya en mi sonrisa murió el último niño.

Otra vez esa flecha clavándose en la noche,

y esa lluvia de otoño para soñar contigo.

.

Otra vez estas manos alzándose hacia el sueño,

y estas sordas raíces sedientas de rocío,

y el profundo desastre de crecer en la sombra,

con los ojos cerrados y los brazos vacíos.

.

Otra vez esa antorcha que extenúa mi sangre,

y ese silencio oscuro que alarga su latido.

—Oh, corazón de fiebre en la floresta negra,

muriendo eternamente y eternamente vivo.

.

Oh, sí, otra vez y siempre morir en cada estrella,

y encender esa lámpara que se apagó de frío.

Oh, sí, otra vez y siempre, hasta morir la vida;

otra vez hacia el alba, por todos los caminos!

12 August 2011

Inspiration and Wavering Hope

Posted in Activism, Deep Ecology, Hobbies, Poetry tagged , , , , , , at 20:31 by rtereholt

I have been re-reading Turtle Island (Gary Snyder, 1974).  It is not a long book, but it is deeply inspirational for me.  Each new reading provokes new thoughts and reflections (which is generally true of Snyder’s work).  I truly admire the writer and his writing.   Turtle Island may be temporarily ousted from its pride of place from time to time, but it always rises back to the top as my favourite of Snyder’s works.

Several years ago, I used an excerpt of one of Snyder’s poems as the texte of a glosa poem for a poetry course.  At the time, I was feeling rather disgusted and depressed about the state of environmentalism in the U.S.  While I still find myself similarly frustrated and ‘wavering’ in hopefulness from time to time, I have since become significantly more active in environmental causes and actions outside my personal sphere.  This most recent re-reading of Turtle Island prompted me to track down that old glosa poem, so that I could revisit the way I felt after reading  ‘As for Poets’ for the first time in a long time…

Inspiration and Wavering Hope

`The life in his poem

Left millions of tiny

Different tracks

Criss-crossing through the mud.`

From `As for Poets`

By Gary Snyder

Deep ecology with Taoist centre–

A new vista unfolds before my disillusioned heart,

and discovery brings profound realizations.

I am an unfinished page, filling through synthesis.

While many are blind, deaf, mute,

the earth writhes with human venom!

Some seek panaceas for their irredeemable consciences;

while one expressed his vision through his words…

With ravenous and undeniable awe, I welcome

the life in his poems.

Buddhist, traveller, teacher, brilliant mind–

Love of life, love of earth, love…

His deeply grounded knowledge and determined life

are examples as I seek my own light-stepping path.

His grasp of the rhythms of earth and human spirit

is embedded in his words– uncanny

how they moved my mind and spirit.

Reading each rising word, each line, I sank.

Those beats, flowing anything but blindly,

left millions of tiny

ripples echoing onto time.

The power in each breath that lingered on his pages,

raw like those wild, restless, and unconformist men,

convince me that some generous passion still is hidden

in human breasts– though some are selfish, inhumane.

The state of nature and of man– both in parallax–

are cause for condemnation not content;

they require us to sacrifice for future while we can.

Like rows of mirrors refract

different tracks

into space and space and space,

so are we reflected down the line with endless relevance.

The torch is flickering while heroes age and die;

this man, too, is failing and sometime will fall.

His thoughts remain to stir me still– and always will;

the surface of that well of words is far from limpid.

My anarchistic optimism strangles angrily on the truth;

yet I, and others, wade stubbornly on with purpose green.

In the end I cannot help but see our hopeful sweat and blood

criss-crossing through the mud.

(August, 2005)

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